Andrew's Birth

Here it is.  THE STORY OF ANDREW’S BIRTH!  It is all here, maybe in too much detail!  Pour yourself a cup of coffee before you start reading…seriously.  Oh, and all the details are for me.  I’m sure there are spelling and grammatical errors, but I have a sweet little Andrew {#1 priority} to take care of right now so I literally wrote it down and didn't edit it at all.

I feel like a lot of birth stories are beautiful.  I think Andrew’s birth was absolutely beautiful, but you should also know that many things went “wrong.”  I hope that someone reads this and realizes that birth can be so very different from what you wanted, imagined, or planned for and that is OK.  Becoming a mother is a beautiful, challenging, painful, overwhelming thing!

So…..

Lee made a masterpiece in our back yard {I need to take a picture}.  He spelled Andrew in pansies!  I married the sweetest man ever.  I walked outside to see what he had been working on and thought I peed my pants.  I had never really done this before, so I wasn’t sure.  I had always heard about it, but I had only had very minor issues with that, nothing like this.  I didn’t say anything to Lee because, um, well it is a little embarrassing {even to tell your husband} to pee on yourself.  I checked things out and decided that IF it was urine, it was quite a bit.  I let Lee know what happened and we decided to call my doctor’s on-call number {it was Sunday, remember} to see what they said.  I was Group B Strep positive, so if it was my water breaking, I needed to get some antibiotics to protect Andrew from getting a bacterial infection at birth.  Well, they said to come in to the hospital to get checked out.  This is where things started to get dicey. 

There is one physician out of the 8 or so in my doctor’s practice that I am not fond of {actually I can’t stand him…at all…he is one of those people who talks AT you instead of WITH you, and I’m not an idiot} and GUESS WHO was on call?  Yep.  HIM.  We’ll call him Dr. C.  Total A-hole.  I saw him at one of my prenatal visits.  I had gained 7 pounds that month after consistently losing weight to the tune of 15 pounds.  I was approximately 28 weeks pregnant at the time.  He, without any hesitation, told me to “stop eating pasta, bread, and ice cream so you don’t gain too much weight.  It is bad for the baby.”  When I let him know I wasn’t able to eat those things and thought the weight gain was a positive thing since I had lost so much previously he replied “well, I am just trying to help you get back into your jeans after you have the baby” and then he blurted out my weight, in front of my parents, at the only appointment they were able to come to.  RUINED IT.  Now you see why I think he is an ass?  OK I’m done ranting about him {not really}.  Oh, and by the way, I gained less than 10lbs. TOTAL my entire pregnancy.  EAT IT Dr. C. 

I sent a text to the charge nurse {Becky} that I was going to go get checked out, and to my bestie, Taylor.  If this had happened earlier she probably would have come to the hospital with me instead of going to work, but it is probably better she wasn’t there for the night.  My water broke around 5:30PM and we got to the hospital around 7.  I {of course} had to take a shower before going to the hospital; I knew I might not get one for a while.  We drove to Harris Methodist Southwest and called my Mom and Shelley while driving.  My Dad was at the house and knew we would be going to the hospital, but he had to go pick up my Mom and Shelley from Southlake.  They called everyone else {Natalee first, of course!} to let them know this was probably IT.  When I arrived at the hospital they checked me in pretty quickly and asked if I was having contractions.  I said I thought I was but they didn’t really hurt.  They got me in a gown/room and checked to make sure my water had broken {it had} and then Dr. C came in.  Good old Dr. C.  I wasn’t even hooked up to a monitor yet, and he started talking about Pictocin.  Lee and I {very nicely} let him know that was not in our plan and shared what we wanted with him.  He kind of scoffed at us and let me know that since I was a first time Mom with a BIG baby that my body wouldn’t be able to labor effectively.  WOW.  Two things pissed me off instantly.  #1 don’t call my baby BIG when you really mean FAT {remember he basically called me a fat ass}.  #2 I need everyone on MY team believing in me.  My body is capable of having a baby!  It grew one for the last 39 weeks & 3 days and…well….dammit I can do ANYTHING!  At that point I decided I was going to wait until my doctor got there to do anything except receive antibiotics.  ANYTHING.  The race for 0700 began.  He also did a breast exam.  I thought it was odd at the time but I was so nervous I didn’t say anything.  Now I think it was REALLY odd. 

My nurse was brand new and it was her last shift on orientation.  She was sweet, but not very smart {my expert opinion} and her preceptor was a total crazy.  I am trying to keep the language to a minimum here FYI, but she was a witch with a capital B.  New Nurse checked me and said I was dilated to about a 3 and 70% effaced.  I got hooked up to the monitors and sure enough I was having contractions, but they weren’t very strong or very regular.  I told New Nurse I was going to get up and walk around after she started my IV and she said that was fine {I wasn’t asking for permission}.  Capital B walked in and asked her if Andrew’s head was engaged, and New Nurse said she didn’t know.  Capital B told me that I couldn’t get up and walk around because it might cause the cord to come out before Andrew’s head.  She was EXCEPTIONALLY rude about it and argued with me when I told her I wanted to naturally stimulate labor.  She brought up Pitocin again.  I got to the hospital at 7pm.  It was MAYBE 8PM at this time.  WOW people really LOVE Pitocin.  I told her that I WOULD be walking around and that I didn’t want to be checked by 50 people, so they needed to do their jobs right the first time {more cervical checks + bacteria = more risk of infection}.  We all know your cervix dilates during labor.  You don’t need to check it 50,000 times to see this.  I told her what I should have told Dr. C {see #2 above} and I firmly let her know that if she wasn’t on board she shouldn’t come back in the room and should find me a nurse that was willing to help me.  Guess what?  I didn’t see her for the rest of the night.  NO JOKE!

New Nurse blew 2 of my forearm veins and stuck me bevel down the first time {I kid you not}.  She got a more experienced nurse who blew my intern vein on the right {side of your wrist for you non-medical readers}, that more experienced nurse got an even more experienced nurse who blew my other intern vein {we are up to the FOURTH stick/blown vein for those of you counting}, and all the while I was begging them to start the IV in my AC {bend of your arm} and they refused.  My Dad had arrived by then and told them they needed to get someone in there that knew what they were doing and that they had one more chance before he started one in my AC.  For the record, I have BEAUTIFUL veins.  FINALLY a nurse came in and confidently started my IV.  I begged her to start an 18 in my AC, but she refused as well and put a 20 {success FINALLY} in my hand that didn’t work when I bent my wrist.  FANTASTIC {sarcasm}.  Little did I know things would go like this all night long. 

I walked, squatted, used the birthing ball, bounced, moved, and did everything you see when you Google: natural labor induction.  EVERYTHING people.  I did this all night.  Dr. C came in multiple times {probably 5 total} to check me and tried to get me to start Pitocin.  I had made some progress and was having stronger, more regular contractions at around 4AM according to New Nurse.  I was super excited that I might not have to use Pitocin.  I was exhausted by this time, so I tried to take a bit of a nap, interrupted by Dr. C.  He tried to convince me to start Pitocin again, and I told him that I wouldn’t be starting it tonight and that I was going to wait for Dr. Butler to arrive.  He sort of scoffed at me again, let me know that I wasn’t making a good decision, told me that my body wasn’t capable of having effective contractions with such a big baby, and left the room.  Lee and I said a prayer that we were making the right decision.  We both felt at peace with using Pitocin, if my labor hadn’t progressed, AFTER Dr. Butler arrived.

My day shift nurse came in with a nursing student.  They were both ROCKING AWESOME.  New Nurse {sweet, but will probably kill someone because she isn’t very smart} had made sure to get me a super positive nurse that was willing to help me have Andrew as naturally as possible.  What a blessing!  Prayers answered!  She was awesome, especially compared to what I had been dealing with all night.  She wasn’t perfect, but who is?  Oh, and come to find out, I was one of two patients in ALL of L&D.  There must have been 8 nurses there that night and I couldn’t get better care??  The other patient in L&D was being induced the next morning and had just checked in early for some reason.  SERIOUSLY??!?  I digress…

Nursing student came in the room super excited……..she heard I was a nurse in the ICU and will be my co-worker in January.  AWESOME.  No offense sweet girl {because you were awesome} but it is a little awkward to know you will be working with the nurse you just met.  She was going to see me naked, at my very worst.  Just sayin.  Little bit awkward.  Taylor had arrived by this time.  She is an ANGEL.  She came straight from working all night in the ICU, in her scrubs, with no sleep, to be with me.  Finally, something, anything, going according to plan.  We chatted about the night and I got my “let’s rock this delivery” attitude back.  I had also talked to my sweet friend {also a nurse} Amanda who has FIVE beautiful kids.  She had one in the hospital with lots of interventions she didn’t want, 3 at home naturally, and her last in the hospital naturally {although she had to fight for it a bit}.  Everyone agreed with my decision to hold out on starting Pitocin until Dr Butler arrived.

Dr. Butler came in and sat down in the rocking chair.  I could tell she thought she was going to have to hard sell me on Pitocin.  I let her say what she wanted to.  She talked WITH me about risks v. benefits and was still very on board with a natural delivery.  She included Lee and Taylor in the conversation.  She was very positive about everything.  She didn’t know that Lee and I had already decided to start Pitocin once she arrived, and seemed pretty surprised that she didn’t have to convince me.  I had been in half labor half weird tiny contractions labor {all in my back} for 14 hours and I was exhausted.  I lost it in front of everyone {I had small cry fests all night with Lee} and Dr. Butler grabbed me, gave me a big hug, and said, “you can do this.  I know you feel like a failure because of the Pitocin, but you’re not.  Your body just needs a little push in the right direction.  You are going to do this.”  I was so thankful for that.  She was right.  I felt like a HUGE failure.  I still feel like a little bit of a failure now.  I get big old tears in my eyes just typing this.  I wanted a NATURAL labor and delivery and I knew I wouldn’t be getting that.  I felt like Pitocin would make my contractions stronger than I could handle and I felt like I was going down the intervention spiral of doom.  My gut was right….

Pitocin started around 7:30 and I began to have hard core contractions very regularly by about 9AM.  We’re talking can’t talk, focused on breathing, contractions at least every 2 minutes, very intense labor.  9AM.  I labored on the birthing ball until about 11AM when Day Nurse says Andrew’s heart rate is having early decels {head compression} due to the ball and I should labor in bed.  Well, I didn’t want to lay on my back in bed {the most ineffective way to labor} so I decided to stand, squat, and pace.  I couldn’t really walk very far because once you start Pitocin they want to continuously monitor the baby and your contractions.  {Can someone please upgrade to wireless monitors already?!} That’s when shit got real.  I felt like I could handle it on the ball, but as soon as I stood up I started to question my ability to take the pain.  Dr. Butler only checked me twice from 7AM until about 1PM.  SHE ROCKS. 

I made it to 6cm dilated and 100% effaced and then craziness ensued.  I had back labor the entire time.  Day Nurse put me in all sorts of crazy positions face down on the bed because they thought the baby was turned sunny side up {face forward instead of back} and we were trying to help him turn naturally.  I couldn’t take the pain like that, so I stood back up.  I doubled over and put my ENTIRE body weight on Lee every single time I had a contraction.  Lee had to go to the bathroom at one point and Taylor took over.  She didn’t realize I was putting my entire weight on Lee!  Lee and Taylor were amazing.  Both of them kept telling me that I could do it.  Taylor kept cracking jokes in between contractions, which helped me try to relax.  I felt like the pain never stopped in between contractions and I couldn’t catch my breath {stupid Pitocin}.  I really tried to use the breathing techniques I had practiced, and then I started puking.  I was holding on to Lee and Taylor, doubled over in pain, puking into a blue bag held by Taylor {true friend}.  That was the final straw.  I demanded an epidural around 130 or 2PM.  Day nurse had just started my last dose of antibiotics, which burned like fire.  It burned SO BAD that I clamped off the IV tubing in the middle of a contraction and told her I wouldn’t take it anymore {thankfully the med was almost finished}.  My entire arm was red from the antibiotic, yet NOBODY, night shift or day shift, would run it in with fluids to dilute it and help the stinging.  They were seriously not the brightest crayons in the box.  I NEVER let my patients complain that much about a medication and refuse to do something about it.  NEVER.  Well, that is when Taylor stepped in.  We both used some choice language, Day Nurse said I was going to blow my vein, Taylor educated her that clamping off IV tubing wouldn’t blow my vein.  I continued to demand an epidural.  Keep in mind I had not wanted this, so Lee and Taylor questioned me repeatedly.  After some choice language, tears, and more vomiting, I spotted the anesthesiologist outside the door. 

He was actually going to another patient’s room.  My nurse said she had to bolus me with a liter of LR {fluids} before I got my epidural.  She turned the IV pump all the way up using the same antibiotics tubing, and I LOST IT on her.  I used all kinds of language.  Thankfully my sweet sweet Taylor stepped in.  Taylor told her to get a new IV in my AC and to get all new tubing.  Well, she didn’t start a new IV, but she did get a new bag of fluids and tubing.  I told the nurse my pressure would hold without the bolus, I promised her it would, but she wouldn’t budge.  I waived the anesthesiologist.  I believe I pointed to him, motioned him over, and pointed to my bed.  Quite the solicitation!  He didn’t walk into the room, so I told Taylor to “grab that man by the balls and drag him in here if you have to!”  That did the trick.  He came in to do my epidural without me having received a bolus {and my blood pressure stayed fine, as promised}.  He did the epidural FAST.  2 minutes fast.  He told the nurse to chart 3 minutes because 2 minutes was too fast.  FAST.  I wasn’t numb when he stuck me {because he did it so fast} so I yelled SOB {not abbreviated}!!!!  He didn’t skip a beat and said “I’ve been called worse!”  Oh, and my labor was SO intense during the epidural.  I had THREE contractions while he was doing the epidural.  THREE.  That is too many.  They should come every 1.5 to 2 minutes.

SWEET EPIDURAL.  They helped me lie down in the bed and for the first couple of minutes my left side was numb, but I could feel the contractions FULL STRENGTH on my right side.  I was terrified that both sides wouldn’t get numb and that getting an epidural was useless, but thank God that didn’t happen.  I completely passed out in bed.  The nurses started the intervention spiral {if you can’t feel the urge to pee and can’t get up to pee you need a foley catheter} while I completely passed out.  My family came in and out of the room while I snoozed, but the nurses stayed in the room and turned me back and forth a million times.  Dr. Butler came in and MAJORLY broke my water {it was only leaking all night}.  She said we were going in the right direction and would have Andrew here in a couple of hours.  Andrew had other plans.  The nurses kept flipping me back and forth in the bed because they would lose the monitor on Andrew’s heart with every contraction.  When they did keep the monitor, his heart rate would drop at the end of the contraction {late decelerations} which signals cord compression, which means lack of oxygen to Andrew, which is BAD.  I knew that he was having some late decals, but I thought his heart rate was still OK and we were still good.  WRONG!  Dr. Butler came in and said we were still OK, but that she was going to put a scalp monitor on Andrew {a small screw that goes into his scalp and monitors his heart rate…I know….screwing something into my baby’s head….not cool}.  It wasn’t really an optional thing, so we did it.  I had enough time to close my eyes and then I was being flipped from side to side again.  I opened my eyes again and my room was full.  Dr. Butler, the anesthesiologist, a CRNA, and multiple nurses surrounded my bed.  Dr. Butler told me Andrew’s heart rate was too low and that he needed to get out now.  I asked what his heart rate was dropping to {I was thinking 100, 110} and she said 60.  I’m pretty sure I hit the ceiling.  I had a major freak out.  Holy WOW.  60 is NOT OK.  I was quickly prepped and whisked away for my emergency c-section.  You can tell in the pictures that I was not a happy Haley.  Oh, and I was still super nauseated and puking.  At this point I asked for another dose of Zofran from the CRNA {he ROCKED hard core} and I’m pretty sure I got some Phenergan but I was so loopy from the drugs I don’t remember.  I do remember that Lee, my family, and Taylor were telling me that everything was going to be OK, and that one of my sisters told me that having  a C-section was better because I would be able to jump on the trampoline without peeing on myself…HA!

I tried so hard to keep my eyes open during the C-section.  I kept feeling like I couldn’t stay awake and my eyes were rolling back in my head {they were according to Lee}.  I remember asking for my vitals at one point because I was CERTAIN I was going to die on the table due to all of the suctioning I heard and because of the way I felt.

At 3:32 PM on Monday, November 26, 2012, Andrew Charles DeLaGarza was born.  He weighed 8 pounds, 12.7 ounces and was 21.5 inches long.  Dr. Butler said “he has strawberry blonde hair” and I immediately started crying.  Lee stood up and looked over the curtain {something he immediately regretted when he saw my open tummy} and they let Andrew peek at me really quickly before the NICU staff whisked him away.  I cried the second I heard him.  His cry was strong and perfect.  I knew he was going to be OK.  At that very moment, I didn’t care if I was going to be OK, all I cared about was that Andrew was out.  I asked for his APGARs {yes, even though I felt like I was dying}.  The NICU doctor or nurse {I can’t remember} came and told me that Andrew was healthy and from that point forward I only have blips of memory.  I remember Dr. Butler coming around and saying that I was being stitched up {soooo much better than staples} by the PA.  I remember her holding Andrew and trying to tell me what had happened and not being able to keep my eyes open.  I felt them rolling back in my head.  I remember Dr. Butler asking about my blood pressure and asking if the Pitocin was wide open {it was, and they had the coolest bolus bags}.  I remember the nurse holding Andrew up to my cheek and Lee holding him so that I could see him while they finished my surgery.  I remember touching his sweet little checks.  I remember not being able to contain my emotion.  I cried tears of joy, happiness, and relief.  I remember trying desperately to keep my eyes open, and failing repeatedly.  I remember asking the CRNA to make me stop shaking.  It really bothered me that I was uncontrollably shaking.  My jaw and shoulders hurt because I was shaking so badly.  I remember worrying about the line on Andrew’s head from the contractions/his position/not being able to come down.

I lost a LOT of blood during surgery.  For my friends who know what this means, my hemoglobin went from 12 something to 7.0.  I felt horrible for a number of weeks just due to that!  Lee, Andrew, and I stayed in the hospital for 5 days.  Andrew was healthy from the very beginning.  He passed all of his tests the first time.  He really did a lot better than me!  I was in some pretty bad pain for about 5 weeks.  Maybe I will go into it at a later date, but I felt very incapable for many weeks after Andrew was born.  I believe a lot of it was hormonal, but a significant portion of it was the fact that I felt like a failure because Andrew was born via C-section.  I realize it is ridiculous, but it is the truth.  I felt like, still sort of feel like, I didn’t do enough.  I relive the situation and wonder if I could have done something better or differently to alter the outcome.  I was really traumatized by the whole experience.  Dr. Butler completely refutes that idea.  She said that I worked harder than anyone she has ever seen to have Andrew naturally.  She said that it would have been IMPOSSIBLE {and she doesn’t use absolutes a lot} for me to have him any other way.  I still have my own personal doubts. 

You’ll see that I am missing a lot of photos.  I have NO photos of my parents with Andrew for the first time.  I have NO photos of Lee, me, and Andrew.  I didn’t change Andrew’s diaper for the first 3 days in the hospital.  I physically couldn’t.  I was so weak and in so much pain.  I was deliriously tired.  I began having auditory and visual hallucinations in the hospital.  We think it was because of the pain medication and exhaustion.  Dr. Butler said that I shouldn’t take Demerol again.  The hallucinations were so real that I was having conversations with people that I saw standing in my room.  Lee was the only one that knew about this; I begged him not to tell anyone because I thought they would take away my pain medication and I was in so much pain.  After I got home, I almost passed out while trying to get in the shower.  I also got very confused and did not know who Lee was.  I kept asking him to get my husband and he would tell me that he was my husband.  He’d say “Haley, I am Lee.  I am your husband.  Your son is right here.  Your parents are in the next room.”  I would yell for him to get my husband and he would calmly repeat himself.  This happened about 5 or 6 times before I finally snapped out of it and told him that I was just very confused.  I can’t imagine how people with memory problems feel; I only had one major incident and I wouldn’t wish the way I felt at that moment on anyone.

Andrew is beautiful.  He is perfect in every way.  I remember, when I first saw him, thinking he looked exactly like Lee but with my hair color.  He was born with such big strong hands and feet.  I cannot believe how much I instantly loved Andrew.  We loved him long before his birth, but the moment he was born I felt like my heart would explode.  I love seeing Lee with Andrew.  He loves him so much and is so gentle with him.  Andrew has made our entire lives better than we could have ever imagined.

Now that you’ve made it to the end of this ridiculously long account, I’ll share another little miracle.  Another little something that God planned for Andrew.  Remember how Andrew got his name?  Remember my great uncle George ANDREW Glass?  Well, guess what?  George’s birthday was November 26 too!  Coincidence?  Absolutely not.  Andrew was divinely planned.

Andrew is a very sweet little boy.  Harper loves him dearly; she gets upset and shakes when he cries!  He is so very loved by his parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends.  We love you Andrew Charles, with all of our hearts.  We cannot imagine our lives without you.  Each day is more special because of you.  We thank God for blessing us with you and for planning your life so perfectly.

Andrew in Mommy's tummy right before heading to the hospital

Happily contracting Sunday night on the birthing ball

I've made progress!  Approximately 3AM.

Laboring away. Sometime after 9AM Monday

Happy Haley in between contractions.  Sometime after 9AM Monday

Lee and me as I was being whisked away to surgery.  You can see Andrew's heart rate and the decels on the computer in the background.  The look on my face is so candid.  I was unhappy, exhausted, and scared.

Being wheeled to the OR.  Yah I know.  Gross, but REAL!

Lee waiting to be brought into the OR.

The first non-naked picture of Andrew!  See the big line on his head from being turned the wrong way and not being able to come out? 

One of the pics in the OR {thanks future co-worker for the pic!}

Lee, me, and baby Andrew!

Feeling Andrew's little cheek

My first up close look at Andrew!

This picture makes me cry every single time.
The only way I made it through this was with Lee holding my hand and keeping
Andrew close to me so that I knew he was OK.

The very first time I touched Andrew.

Showing off his strong lungs!

First photo as a family of 3!  I was REALLY forcing this smile.

Dr. Butler holding a brand new Andrew!
Best OB/GYN EVER.  I mean it.  I'd recommend her to anyone, especially if you're in the medical field!

The whiteboard in my PP room
Thanks Shelley!

Andrew Charles DeLaGarza.  Night #1

My sweet boys.  Andrew 6 days old.

Andrew 2 days old sleeping on Daddy's chest in the hospital

Andrew 3 days old sleeping with Mommy in the hospital.
Check out the gigantic bruise on my arm from one of the many IV attempts (4 days previously)!